Emotional intelligence in IT: The secret to advancing your career

Let’s be honest: in IT, we’re obsessed with metrics, uptime, and automation. But when it comes to leading teams, there’s a tool even more powerful than your favorite script or dashboard—emotional intelligence (EI). Emotional intelligence is crucial to understanding the real needs of your colleagues and ensuring you provide them with the support that helps them, and your company, achieve their goals. Yes, even for those of us who’d rather troubleshoot a network than navigate a team meeting.

Why emotional intelligence matters

Sure, AI can automate, analyze, and even out think us in some ways. But here’s the kicker: no matter how smart your code gets, it can’t replace the human factor. As Ed Hess, co-author of Humility Is the New SmartOpens a new window , explains, “In the Smart Machine Age (SMA), machines will surpass humans in processing, remembering, and synthesizing information. To remain relevant, humans must excel at critical thinking, innovative thinking, creativity, and high emotional engagement—skills that complement technology or that technology cannot yet replicate.” Hess calls this new paradigm “NewSmart,” emphasizing that emotional intelligence and interpersonal skills are now essential for thriving in tech and business, not just technical know-how.

This perspective is echoed in Forbes, where leadership experts argue that emotional intelligence is now absolutely indispensable for leadership. As Sanjay Sehgal writesOpens a new window , “The most effective leaders are all alike in one crucial way: They all have a high degree of what has come to be known as emotional intelligence… Without it, a person can have the best training in the world, an incisive, analytical mind, and an endless supply of smart ideas, but he still won’t make a great leader.”

The data backs this up: The 2025 Gallup Workplace ReportOpens a new window highlights that only 21% of employees worldwide are engaged at work, with engagement and well-being at historic lows. The report finds that managers account for 70% of the variance in team engagement, and that leadership qualities like hope, trust, and compassion—core elements of emotional intelligence—are crucial for improving retention, reducing stress, and building thriving teams.

A 2017 studyOpens a new window published in the Journal of Occupational and Organizational Psychology further confirms stating, “When the dependent variable was job satisfaction, emotional intelligence acted as a strong predictor, even when personality traits and proactive personality were controlled. These findings provide preliminary evidence that emotional intelligence is a relevant addition to guide the achievement of career success.”

E-motion: The energy that moves IT teams

Here’s a handy way to remember it: “emotion” is really “E-motion”—energy in motion. The “E” stands for energy, engagement, and executive presence. Emotions are what get us out of bed for that 7 a.m. deployment, push us to troubleshoot gnarly bugs, and help us rally the team when things go sideways. The right emotional setting can turbocharge your team’s motivation and creativity. The wrong one? That’s how you end up with a ticket queue longer than your last compliance audit.

How EI shows up in the server room 

Self-awareness: Know when you’re about to snap because the backup failed (again). Take a breath. Leaders who are self-aware recognize their emotional triggers and understand how their moods impact decision-making and team morale.

Self-regulation: Keep your cool when the project manager moves up the deadline. Your team is watching how you handle stress. High-EI leaders regulate their emotions and maintain a positive outlook, even in challenging situations.

Motivation: Show your crew why their work matters. Even a “nice job squashing that bug” can go a long way. Emotionally intelligent leaders inspire and motivate teams, driving higher engagement and productivity.

Empathy: Notice when your usually chatty sysadmin goes quiet. Maybe they’re burned out. Maybe they just need a donut. Either way, check in. Empathy is a crucial skill in tech management, helping leaders support team members and reduce turnover.

Social skills: Build relationships, not just networks. That means listening (not just waiting to talk), giving feedback, and celebrating wins—big or small. Leaders with strong social skills foster collaboration and resolve conflicts before they escalate.

The business case: EI gets results (and gets you noticed)

The numbers don’t lie. Emotional intelligence predicts 67% of a leader’s effectivenessOpens a new window and is a better predictor of career success than IQ. Tech pros with high EI can rake in up to $29,000 more per yearOpens a new window than their less emotionally savvy counterparts (ElectroIQ, 2025). Teams led by high-EI leaders are more cohesive, innovative, and resilient. They communicate better, adapt faster, and are less likely to suffer from burnout or turnover.

But here’s the kicker for your own career: higher-ups notice emotionally intelligent leaders. According to research published in PMC and echoed by Forbes, EI not only predicts job satisfaction and performance but also extrinsic career success—think promotions, raises, and reputation. Leaders who foster trust, resolve conflicts, and inspire teams are the ones executives remember when it’s time to hand out new responsibilities (and bigger paychecks).

How to level up your emotional Intelligence

Practice active listening: Actually listen to your team, instead of mentally composing your next witty Slack reply.

Ask for feedback: Thoughtful feedback is a gift. Actively seek it out from your manager, your peers, and your direct reports.

Reflect on your triggers: Know what sets you off—then work on your response.

Model vulnerability: Admit when you don’t know something or when you mess up. It builds trust.

Celebrate wins, learn from fails: Both are part of the job. Make it safe for your team to do the same.

Higher-ups are watching for (and rewarding) EI

When you consistently demonstrate high EI—by managing stress, resolving conflicts, and motivating your team—your reputation as a leader grows. Senior management notices the managers who can keep teams engaged, navigate change with grace, and deliver results without burning people out. As a result, you’re more likely to get tapped for high-visibility projects, promotions, and leadership roles.

The bottom line: Emotional Intelligence is the secret sauce

In tech, we’re used to thinking in terms of hardware, software, and networks. But the most important system you’ll ever manage is the human one. Emotional intelligence is the climate control for your workplace—set it right, and everyone’s comfortable and productive; set it wrong, and you’ll be dealing with more than just overheating servers.

So, the next time you’re troubleshooting a gnarly outage or leading your team through a big change, remember: EI isn’t just a buzzword. It’s what separates the leaders people want to follow from the ones they just have to tolerate. And, yes, the folks in the C-suite are paying attention.

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